I need to figure this one out, what triggered this positive turn of events. If doing a small thing that you haven’t in ages can be deemed positive.
Since 1988 or so I have been doing the Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle. Every weekend. I’ve described this in more detail in a blog post, but we (my wife) went to no ends to find the NYT no matter the location.
Hotels all over the US, Canada, Mexico and various Caribbean islands. She would track one down for me, just to complete the Sunday NYT crossword. On a few occasions a fax from the US would do the trick.
I would take out my then trusty pen, you know the one right? The one you love to use for several months then lose it. Only to find a replacement. Pens are like my past loves.
Anyway, I could usually complete the puzzle, one of the hardest on the planet, in ink, and normally by noon. I was a member of the silent cult dedicated to completing this.
“King that was slain in Macbeth”
“Literary suggestions”
“See No Evil author” and so on.
21 x 21 squares, 75 across clues and the same going down.
But here’s the story, for some reason I completely lost interest in doing this the past what? 2 maybe 3 years. We still paid the exorbitant price for home delivery each week, and sometimes I would open the magazine to the back page, stare at the puzzle, then add to it the ever growing pile of others undone and dusty.
For the last 3 weeks I have picked up the Sunday Times, found the magazine and completed the puzzle.
3 weeks in a row. Always a challenge, but always in ink. A feeling of accomplishment.
The question is why the change? In either direction. Why did I even stop or start back up.
Why did I lose complete interest, only to have it return in full?
I really have to suss this out…search for the meaning. The trigger. A positive sign that things may get better.
Shaking the depression…I’m rambling
Kyd