A LONG WAY FROM HOME
I need to quit watching the news. More specifically the news from the grand country that gave birth to democracy. Although I reside in Canada, I’m still a citizen of the U.S., so watching CNN is a favorite (or used to be a favorite) pastime.
I can’t believe that in today’s turmoil that the subject of trans people in high school sports, more so transwomen than transmen, is even worth more than a five minute blurb in the news.
Let’s move on already.
I didn’t choose this life. Being trans that is. I was aware of being “different” at a very young age, but insisted on fighting it for years. Wasting my life trying to deny the fact I was queer.
Lady GaGa tries to normalize it by convincing “normal” folks that we’re simply born this way. I personally don’t agree with that 100%, at least not for everyone. I hold strongly to the belief that its nature and nurture combine to drive people toward this pathway.
If I only have one message in this journal, besides that of perseverance, it would simply be “Transition or die”. I put that in quotes because it’s not my original words of wisdom to claim authorship. I was first told those words of wisdom by Cassandra, in an America Online chat room called “Transexual Menace”.
I believe it was 1991 when I would sit up late at night and spend hours and hours going from one chat after another. All of America did the same at different times of the day, but in the middle of the night creatures like myself took to the chats, searching for others of a like mind. AOL was the easiest way to access this new phenomena called the Internet, just in its infancy for home use.
Continue reading “The “Message””This is a very difficult subject for me to write about. But it’s an important part of the transition journey.
As I’ve written elsewhere on my stance on Sex vs. Sexual Identity vs. Gender. I believe there are only 3 types of Sexual Orientation (SO); homesexual, heterosexual or bi-sexual. Period. Anything outside of that can be considered fetishism. But let’s use the nicer terms of gay, bi and straight, shall we?
My opinion, while respecting that everyone may not see it as I do.
Continue reading “A FLUID SEXUAL IDENTITY”September 1st 2023 was the date of the big event.
The culmination of a long wait and journey, or just the beginning?
I really need to capture just the events of that specific day, while it’s still very fresh in my mind.
After 2 failed attempts to transition from male to female I started the new journey. On January 1 of 2020 I first began using hormones to start the change process. A separate blog will come on the use of HRT (hormone replacement therapy) and everything required to get to this point.
Continue reading “THE SURGERY”SRS. That’s the way it was initially described and written. Sexual (male/female) Reassignment (changing sexes) Surgery….hmmm.
That’s the way it should remain in my opinion. Remember my first premise, that society has blurred the true transexual person by believing in the term “gender”. You don’t need surgery to change gender or change masculinity or femininity. Just go to a great hairstylist (or wig maker), esthetician, and find a dressmaker who knows their stuff and whamo…change of gender!
Continue reading “Sexual Reassignment Surgery a/ka Gender Affirming Surgery”Unless I need to be downtown, most of my days start off slow, gain a little momentum, then fizzle out by 4:00pm. By slow, if I’m out of the shower by 9:30 I’m doing good.
The first dose of hydromorphone starts the day, hormones and a pill to keep all the other pills from destroying my stomach. The hydromorphone numbs the pain enough to get a hot shower, walk and feed the dogs, maybe remember to eat, then run errands.
Unless I’m nauseated from kidney stones that is, then the day is a write off. The stones are just starting. It just builds up for months as they get bigger I guess.
Continue reading “Some Days are Overwhelming, Some are Wondrous”I made a statement to a friend on Wednesday, someone I deeply love and admire, and believe it is the truest thing I have ever said.
I’ll quote myself, as I remember the words, wishing it had been flowing prose but true nonetheless.
“I wish I could have lived this life as a woman, had the chance anyway. I would have been happier.”
Could have been phrased a bit better, but that’s the way it came out.
Continue reading “IF ONLY I HAD THE CHANCE…”